


Desperate times...

by Seven_Oomen



Series: Symbrock call center crack series [1]
Category: Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Curses, M/M, Multi, Other, eddie and venom work in a call center, sharing my experiences through fanfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 17:18:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16978692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seven_Oomen/pseuds/Seven_Oomen
Summary: Eddie takes a job at a call center but when you're bonded to a symbiote that doesn't do well with bullshit, well, shenanigans ensue.





	Desperate times...

**Author's Note:**

> Based on real interactions this customer service agent for a major cable company has been through. If you recognize any of this, leave kudos or comment. If you would love to see more of customer service agents Venom and Eddie, comment down below!

A job was a job, no matter what it was or what it paid. It paid his rent and therefore, he had very little to complain about. Even though the life foundation had been unmasked and his name had been cleared, his boss hadn’t taken him back. And although Annie and Dan could technically support them financially, Eddie didn’t want them too. So he’d taken a part-time job as a customer service agent for a big cable company.

“Big Cable company, this is Thomas speaking, how may I help you?” They never gave out their real names, people could look you up on facebook. these days. Not that he’d had anything to fear, but he didn’t want Annie or Dan to get hurt.

“Hello??” An old geezer on the other end of the line, breathing so loudly into the line that shivers ran down his spine. And not in a good way. 

He groaned mentally, pinching the bridge of his nose while he spoke in the most cheerful manner he could muster. “Hi sir, how may I help you?” 

**We got another old guy.**

 The voice on the other end of the line sounded croaky, a breathy panic clearly coming through. “My tv ain’t working. It says no signal, what should I do?”

“I’m so sorry to hear that sir,” He tried to sound as empathically as he could, but he silently braced himself for a shitstorm. “Is the DVR on?”

“What ya think I am, stupid?” 

Well… he wasn’t going to say it- He technically couldn’t.

**Yes.**

“No no, of course not, I just-” He leaned back in his chair and stared up at the ceiling.

“Of course it’s on. It’s on a channel thingy.”

**I did not suffer through six hundred million years for this-**

That made both of them… Jesus Christ-

“That’s great sir-” He gave his most awkward fake chuckle, but it was all he could muster at the moment.

“So’s my tv and it ain’t my cable..” The old geezer went on-

“… - Uhm. Of course it isn’t.” It was, either that or the bloody source channel. It always was with these people.

**He pulled out the cable.**

“We don’t know that-” It escaped him before he realized it and he flinched as soon as he heard the high pitched pterodactyl scream coming through the phone line. Fuck.

“WHAT YA MEAN YOU DON’T KNOW THAT? LEMME TELL YA SONNY!”

“No sir, that wasn’t-” Eddie stammered-

**Can we eat him?** V sounded far too cheerful in his own mind. Although it was tempting.

Oh god just kill him- Anne would never let him live this down…

**“** BACK IN MY DAY-”

Dan would sympathize at least and make them hot cocoa. Dan was the best.

“I’m sure that was a wonderful time, sir. But right now I’m trying to fix your signal.”

And just like that, the guy stopped screaming. Thank Thor for small miracles.

“Oh, right good. You get right on that, sonny.” And the old geezer was back to breathing into the phone. He got the sneaking suspicion the old geezer got off on this.

“Sir, Can you check the wall plug for me?”

 He could mentally see V’s grin.  **That’s what Anne asked Dan about your ass last night.** Fuck help him.

“I ain’t gonna check a single thing. Send me a free mechanic.” The old geezer huffed.

**Bad guy?**

“No he’s not a bad guy-” Eddie swatted at his ear, wincing when he accidentally hit it.

“What was that sonny?”

“Nothing sir, nothing.” He replied quickly, turning off his microphone for a second or two. “Darling, be quiet.” 

He turned his attention back to the caller and turned his headset back on. “Sir, do you know where the source button is on your remote? It says source or it’s a button with the little square with an arrow through it.”

**He’s an idiot, Eddie. He doesn’t know where to find his own ass.**

“Course I know where that damn button is- Can’t you just send me a free mechanic?”

“No sir, we charge a fee for our mechanics, it’s a standard fee of forty dollars, unless the defect is in our signal or our equipment. Then we pay the charge.” He quickly muted the headset down as pterodactyl screams assaulted his ears once again.

“What kind of service is this?! Where’s your manager?”

**Are you sure we can’t eat him?**

“I’m tempted…”  Eddie muttered under his breath.

He tried his best to sound sorry as he turned his full attention to the customer. “My manager isn’t available sir. But I can leave them a message for you.”

“I want to speak to a manager. Do you have any idea how old I am son?” 

**I’ve seen infants more capable.** V rumbled, agitated and on edge by the old geezer’s behavior towards him.

“I can see your birthdate sir, so yes.”

“Are you threatening me, sonny?” If the man wasn’t agitated before, he certainly was now.

Something in V just snapped at that point.  **We are eating him. We know where he lives.**

“We are not eating him!” Eddie snapped back, realizing just a little too late he’d said that out loud. 

“Hello? Sir? Fuck.”

Anne would never let him live this down… 

**Author's Note:**

> Lemme know what you all think? Want more? Want more ot4 too?


End file.
